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a message to you................ Wednesday, July 30, 2008 / 4:14 PM
没有期望，就不会有失望。。。 没有失望，就不会绝望。。。 或许，绝望也不是一件坏事。。
累了就应该休息吧。。 想一想下一站要往哪里去。。。 自己一个人有时也可以是幸福的。。。
加油！你做得到的！！
有一天你会发现你比现在坚强。。。
hang on there..that day will come... Believe in yourself bcause I believe in you..........
Independence day!! Thursday, July 17, 2008 / 6:17 PM
I've done a silly thing on saturday(12Jul08). I pack whatever I should (water bottle, umbrella, bread & tibits) & set off to night safari alone!!.. Yes, ALONE! wahaha..i'm bored & i've no mood for anything except for chill out at quiet relaxing bar/pub..but no one's free for that. I can't be going alone..I don't want to be seen sitting alone in bar & looked as if i m waiting to be picked up. Haha..I wanted to go for stroll or star gazing.. but again those places i thought of seems dangerous to go alone & sky is getting dark.. I thought of gg for a jog..but its dangerous too.. Argh!! there are just so limited activities a gal can do alone esp at night... *maybe i m just plain timid..wahaha..watever.. i need to worry about my safety..keke...*
so.. the only place i can tink of is night safari.. had always wanted to go..went once in my earli twenties birthday with bao, xiao bai, hy, ting & elaine, we went round the zoo on tram & left the place after tat..haha.. it wasn't enuf for me, i wanted to go around the zoo on foot..but did not have a chance tat time. So to fulfill my wish, i went on saturaday.. wahaha..
Check all information that I needed to know from internet & off i went.. The most impt info is the last bus out of the zoo & the one i can take back home..I'm so proud of myself to have plan everything on my own..haha.. Actually b4 setting off i'm having half hearted feeling to go or not to. It was around 8.30pm when I finally leave the house. It will be 9.30 by the time i reach & i gota leave the zoo at 11.30(last bus to town..)..only 2 hrs to roam around the zoo..seems rush!! haha..& the last show time indicated in the website is 9.30pm.. Feel so disapointed seeing that. Anyway, after much hesitation, i still went ... keke..
Reach the zoo slightly earlier (9.20pm).. Got my ticket (Heartache knowing that there's a 20% discount for Citibank credit card..i Don't have!!!)..Got to know that the last show time is at 10.30pm..wahaha.. so happy.. *the last show time shown in the website is 9.30pm..tis was 1 of the reason for my hesitation in the 1st place too..Thought no point gg if no show to watch..*
Went for a quick exploration...Did not plan the road i want to take..just walk upon seeing walk path..haha..*my mind keeps reminding me about the show at 10.30..i just cant miss it..keke.. * around 10.10pm..i headed to the show time center..gosh..long queue wor.. waited for about 10 mins *for previous batch viewers to come out of the centre b4 we were allowed to go in.... *..
Enjoyed the show thou the show kind of forever repeating the same old thing..haha. the otter's picking up rubbish & throwing into recycle bin seems an old act since young..opps..maybe recycle bin wasn't added tat time..hee..another performance was having a big snake at the audience seat..it look as if the snake escape..& create a whole lot of commotion..haha..luckily i wasnt sitting infront.. i would have fainted!!..* i think the trainer put tat snake out when we were engrosed in other performance*..the snake escaping was a nice move..hahaha..sth new.. Know what? it took 4 trainer to carry the snake..can imagine hw heavy it is....Ya, the added entertainment for the show wasn't really on the animals performance. It was more on the main lady who bring out the fun.. the way she present & talk.. was real funny..hahaha..
Show ended slightly 5 mins after 11..wanted to continue my exploration..but I've gota catch the last bus out at 11.30pm..Drop the idea and went to check out Ulu Ulu village. Thought food price there should be reasonable but but .......a plate of chicken rice cost $17 and a bowl of Ulu Ulu laksa cost $13..Xia si ren!! haha..
Well, once in awhile being alone doing things issnt tat bad afterall.. At least you can do and go whatever and wherever you want,not having to worry if frens/partner find it boring..When i saw the sign Mandai ZOo while still on the bus, i was feeling so excited..haha..but the moment i alighted at the bus stop..my heart sank abit thou, maybe it was becos i often go zoo with companion, nvr alone..hmmmm.. for a moment loneliness sat in.. But the feeling was gone fast too..Maybe i was rushing for time. & was quite surprise that safari was pretty packed that day oso..hee..My attention turned to this interesting *Cultural Performances after getting my ticket.. The zoo wasn't really that safe as i thought..maybe i was timid..haha..some of the walking trails can be quite quiet & dark..Many a time, i was being frightened by pple who suddenly appear out of nowhere..hahaha.. oh ya, i happen to see a lady alone too. was wondering was she like me alone too.. hee..
Going home Plan... Take a Bus By Bus Hub Service (Daily), Cost $4.. It takes u to city area..my plan was to take the bus, alight at Hotel Rendezvous (Bus-stop B01 opposite Hotel on Prinsep Street), walk to Bugis to take bus No. 51. Clever rite? hee.. *Did not go home as plan instead I went back to lovenest to meet bao for dinner *supper i gues, it was 1+am by the time i ate my wan tan mee!! haha..* But proud thing is..I did not take any CAB to travel around..*
* Hailing from the rainforests of Borneo, the Thumbuakar Tribe will perform tribal dances, blowpipe demonstrations and fire-eating displays.
LOST &FOUND
Interesting article from The NEwpaper.. ---------------------------------------------------- LOVE: LOST &FOUND MORE Singaporeans are falling in love, out of love, and back in love again. So say statistics released last week, which indicate divorces and remarriages are on the rise. Why is it so hard to make love last? To find the answer, we visit places that couples may find themselves in the course of their love story. Our question: What makes a marriage tick?
THE MATCHMAKER The place: Swivel chairs, fluorescent lighting and pictures of young, foreign brides. A matchmaking agency - where the loveless find love.
Most often-heard phrase: 'Singaporean women are so demanding.'
The love guru: A matchmaker, Mr Janson Ong, owner of Life Partner Matchmaker, which specialises in Vietnam brides. (Statistics show a rise in the number of inter-ethnic marriages.)
His thoughts: 'A marriage that fails today would have started failing a few years ago, and when you look at the past 10 years, you'll see that it was not an easy time for couples. We had 9/11, Sars, a lot of negative equity. For some people, it's no money, no love. We have to be realistic about this. So matchmaking is a short-cut. It is for people who know what they are looking for. My clients are looking for a simple housewife. Is it true love? It's just switching the order. Instead of love, then marriage, it's marriage, then love. By thinking of marriage before courtship, you are forced to think about the future first, then work backwards from there. You are forced to make things work. It's not that easy to walk out of a marriage.'
THE SOLEMNISER The place: A beach, a ballroom, the Registry of Marriages (ROM). A place where marriage vows are exchanged - and the fairytale begins.
Most often-heard phrase: 'I don't know what it (a marriage vow) means.'
The love guru: A solemniser from ROM, Brother Emmanuel.
His thoughts: 'Of the 900 or so couples I've helped marry over the past 30 years, about one quarter of them come in with wrong expectations. Most of them do not know what a marriage vow really means, that it is not a vow you make to yourself or to your spouse, but to your god. It doesn't matter what religion you have, or if you even have one. A marriage vow is a promise to the supreme being in your heart, whatever name you call it. A marriage is sacred. It's a vow you should never break.'
THE GYNAECOLOGIST The place: Syringes, latex gloves and a doctor's white coat. A gynaecologist's clinic - where love becomes complete.
Most often-heard phrase: 'Is my baby normal?'
The love guru: A gynaecologist, Dr Cathryn Chan.
Her thoughts: 'The birth of a baby is a critical time in a relationship. Babies are 'romance intruders' in certain ways. Caring for them may be an anti-climax after the romance. To keep their love going strong, couples should not focus all their energy on the baby. They must remember to make time for each other. But sometimes, the child keeps a couple together only because of the responsibility. So when the child is all grown up, the couple suddenly find themselves having grown apart. This is why in the future, we may see more and more older couples with grown-up children divorcing.'
THE LAWYERS The place: A receptionist, a conference room, a bird's eye view from high up in the Central Business District. A lawyer's office - where the fairy tale ends.
Most often-heard phrase: 'What happened to the wife/husband I knew?'
The love gurus: Lawyers Stuart Palmer and Ahmad Nizam Abbas from the matrimonial department of Straits Law.
Their thoughts: Mr Ahmad: 'The fact that there were fewer divorces in the past does not mean there were happier marriages. Women were less independent then. Divorce was a bigger taboo.' Mr Palmer: 'Times have changed. And the pressures of modern life can lead to a breakdown in communication.' Mr Ahmad: 'That may not seem like a problem when a couple first gets together. They have a meeting of minds, then they get married. The first year of a marriage... that is critical. If they can survive it, they are good for another five or six years. These will be busy years, when you have your children, buy a car, or buy a flat. During this time, the couple may gradually grow in different ways. But they will only realise this later, when things settle down and boredom sets in. Then, by the time they come to see us, they say, 'What happened to the wife/husband I knew?' Mr Palmer: 'Couples must remember - the communication begins before a marriage, not after.'
THE FUNERAL DIRECTOR The place: An air-conditioned office in a Toa Payoh industrial park, opposite a welder's workshop. A funeral parlour, where the love story ends the way it should - 'till death do we part'.
Most often-heard phrase: 'I see my wife/husband in my children.'
The love guru: A funeral director, Victor Hoo from Singapore Funeral Services
His thoughts: 'I come in at the end of a beautiful love story and my role is to fill in the emptiness - with memories of their love. But we do see the good, the bad and the ugly? People say 'till death do us part'. But what they don't say is, is it a sad parting or a happy parting? Sometimes, the spouse is so relieved the husband or wife is gone. But I can tell whether a couple's love is true, just by looking. And it's not from the crying. It's how much attention they pay to the details of the funeral - the colour of this, the position of that... It's like they are loving the person as if he or she is still there. And this is what true love is: When you can still love someone without his or her physical presence.'
Nervous Nervous... Wednesday, July 16, 2008 / 6:20 PM
Called up the officers frm GSI to invite them for my wedding this afternoon..Chatted with 3 officers in total, after hanging up.. my heartbeat was beating super fast..wahahaha.. i reckon it might be becos i m announcing my BIG day to more & more people..I guess i was seriosuly nervous having made known to more & more pple.. argh!! i tried to calm myself, but was hard.. took a real long time before i finally calmed down..
Friday is coming soon..Its one of the long awaited day too..A day I've got to book our ROM date.. wo de ma ah!!!....... few mths ago, this day seems far.. gosh, now its oni 2 days away..& when friday come.. it will mean my BIG day is exactly 3 mths away...........
WO De MA AH!!!
I love this picture. = Saturday, July 12, 2008 / 6:27 PM
Found this picture while searching for another blogskin for my blog. nice picutre issnt it? the gal seems so carefree..*i've got great creativity!! haha* ..How i wish I am that carefree too..Maybe tonight can be another star grazing night for me again...
Wedding Photoshoot...
170608 : Wedding photo taking day!! Woot woot..Was really excited and nervous about the coming of this day..The past few days were really stressful for me..Suddenly my life seems so busy. Tight project deadline at work, preparation for phototaking.. phew!!!..ya, u al muz be wondering..wat's ther to prepare for phototaking..well well.. we've got nothing to go for the phototaking.No shoes, no wedding bands, bao got no ties, no shirts..I've got to do mani/pedi, color hair..go facial...blah blah blah..haha..maybe i'm juz taking it too seriously..yes, I was..once in a lifetime phototaking wor..hw can i take it lightly..& gues the fact tat i keep telling myself i wun look nice..stress me even more to try keep the best shape,look the best at the eleventh hr... erm..din succeed anyway.. keke...
Both of us were so worried about the weather that we were tracking on the weather report on our individual way.. He was concentrating on CNN news, while i had my ears on the radio.. hee..Our heart kind of sank abit when it was announced cloudy den heavy rain expected.. *sianzs half..* but luckily, weather turn out to b quite gd..
nevertheless, we still set off to the bridal studio after packing our barangs..We reach 15 mins b4 10..the studio was not opened yet. So we decided to go market for breakfast at the same time sourcing for balloons or rose petals..Bao say he wasn't hungry..so we went around sourcing stuffs instead..went t.pagar market den to IP.. Never have know that red rose petals gota order in advance. both stalls at t.pagar market only have colorful petals..so sad.. Finally manage to find 1 small pack frm florist at IP.. $2 for a pack..so happy.. well, we din manage to get balloons.. as expected..but its okie. =)
so around 10.25.. Freda (1 of the bridal cooridinator) arrived to open door.. Make up started for me.. =)
Were in the studio taking indoor photos. Was pretty shy during photo session, haha..super stiff too..guess too many pple were around looking at us. there were 2 make up artists (1 is mine,1 is artist's fren)..den on & off the boss & my coordinator will pop over to see. shy rite? so many pple around..haha..
We tried to do some loving pose (e.g looking into each other eyes, nose to nose etc) as requested, but many a time, photographer was commenting that our pose seems no feeling, the feeling was wrong blah blah..haha..Dangerous rite? NO feeling? its just so hard to pose those loving pose.. or maybe we were too stiff.. hmmmmmm...besides, i dun noe y i keep giggling during those poses too.Juz find it funny..hee..maybe the word "xiao" was written all over bao's forehead..haha..so difficult to ctrl my giggles. =p
Anyway, al along we have nvr been those kind of lovey dovey couple..our love life is more to crappy & nonsense one.. i gues we wil pose more naturally when it comes to funi mischievous pose.. haha...
we took indoor photos til around 4.20pm.. had a quick lunch (lunch dabao by bao, i cant be out scaring pple with that thick makeup..hee). was super hungry by then, & i ate quite alot.. keke.. the shooting for very fitting gowns were over, not so stress..can eat more..haha..Around 5pm..we left studio for outdoor shoot.
Guess because we left for outdoor shoot at 5pm, the weather was pretty cooling..It was not as bad as what frens used to describe. We or rather I was so kiasu that the day b4 the shoot,i requested to go shopping at carefour for insect repellent, xi you zi, hair treatment, blah blah blah.. haha.. On actual day itself i brought with us packs of tissues,a small towel, whole box of mosquitoes patch (tis is the most impt thing to me, i'm super prone to mosquitoes kisses..haha..), xi you zi etc. expecting that we would perspire alot,i wouild get lotsa bites. *scary experiences frm frens & others got me well prepared!! haha better be safe den sorry..*.. erm..but guess all my efforts has gone down the drain, none of the things brought were put into use except a pack of tissue & some xi you zi..haha...
Overall, i'd enjoyed the photo session alot..If only, we can take it again.its real real fun.. Had so much ideas in mind on how i want the photos to be taken, but i did not share out any..did not want the trouble of having headache selecting photos later..haha..
Places we went.. 1st place : a small park at alexandra..requested to go for the swing on a tree,saw it when photographer showed us his masterpiece taken for others.. well, nt reali amuse by the swing..kind of regret gg..*(-.-")* haha... 2nd place : Hort Park 3rd place : A run down building at CHangi *Love this the most!!!* 4th place : the beach near safra chalet.
if only..............
If only i could turn back time.. What would I have done???
There are so much to say yet, i have this difficulty in expressing & blogging it dwn.. It frustrating..cos the only thing i m doing is feeling the hurt, disapointment,sadness & regrets inside me...
Maybe its time to go back to the silent world of mine. the gal i used to be when i was younger.. writing dairy & keeping things.. The world seems to b more beautiful then..
Can't help but to share this cute clip extracted from baby Joanie's blog. She is such a lovable sweet gal.. Was feeling so stress & panicky in office, so i went into her blog wanting to see some of her cute photos to calm myself (I'm a big fan of her blog, it always drive my unhapiness away when looking at her photo or clips..).. & her mummy uploaded this clip..It makes mi smile while watching.. Awe................sweet cutie pie.... *big teddy hug for her.. *
Check out Jo whenever she hears 'Clap, Clap, Clap Your Hands' song!
great sunday......... Monday, July 7, 2008 / 6:09 PM
Wkend was OVER.. Again, just when u tot u were njoying it..it was over.. :(
Had a great sunday. =)
went for the movie 10 promises to my dog..A touching & heartwarming movie..erm.. abit draggy thou.. The aftermath review from me..this shows does not only remind us to be responsible to the pet we decided to keep. but s.hw i feel tat it is also reminding us to treasure the times with our family (esp our parent), be appreciative to what they have done/sacrifice... i don't know y it lead me to this thinking..guess its the part when the daughter grow up & gets so busy that its her turn to neglect her father..& her father's turn to have a feel of what the daughter & her mother went thru during his hectic life as a doctor.. Suddenly i reflected myself on hw i treat my parent..GUilty is the only word i found in me. Hiazs.. Anyway, the show ended with many of the ladies in the cinema in tears..haha..erm.. alrite alrite.. i was 1 of them, but i wipe it b4 bao realise it..if nt, he's gg to suan me.. Nasty fellow!! haha.. There was this couple siting beside me, the guy was slping during the movie..as it ended, he realise his gf crying..he struggle to get tissue & help his gf to wipe..den was like hugging her tightly.wahaha. i dun noe shld i consider sweet or seems funi to me.. i mean erm...not tat sad to that extent rite? haha.oki, maybe i was being bad.. well, maybe i m jeolous? haha.. nah.. i m not... guess the bf was sweet.. haha..
Had a sinful dinner, a mudpie frm NYDC and finish up the whole pack of popcorn bought for the movie.. A great achievement indeed. 1st time finishing up a whole pack of popcorn myself (bao help to eat a little..really a little.haha).. Guess for the nxt few shows in the near future, I will not crave for popcorn anymore..haha..
Finally i get my feet step into keppel at marina bay.. that is a nice tranquill place..its quiet.. so peaceful. mood was calmer & better..hw i wish i could stay longer..but it's getting late.. a pity i din bring my camera along.. took some photos using hp(abit blur,will upload if there are nice one. =) ).. will like to visit it again..the nxt time, i wun forget my camera..
One Republic - Apologize Thursday, July 3, 2008 / 11:59 PM
I stumbled upon this song while reading someone's blog. Know what, this is one of the song used in my bodysculpt lesson. I fall in love when i 1st hear it in the class.But I did not manage to find out the song title which makes it harder for me to find the song..So happy to have found it now..its a sad song thou, but still hope u njoy.. =)
I'm holding on your rope, Got me ten feet off the ground I'm hearin' what you say But I just can't make a sound You tell me that you need me Then you go and cut me down, but wait You tell me that you're sorry Didn't think I'd turn around, and say that...
It's too late to apologize, it's too late I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I'd take another chance, take a fall Take a shot for you And I need you like a heart needs a beat But it's nothing new I loved you with a fire red - Now it's turning blue, and you say... "Sorry" like the angel heaven let me think was you But I'm afraid...
It's too late to apologize, it's too late I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
Guitar/Piano Bridge
It's too late to apologize, it's too late I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late It's too late to apologize, yeah I said it's too late to apologize, yeah - I'm holdin' on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground...
The uninteresting ..low self-esteem Me....
An indescribable stressful feeling creeps in.. i do not know why, I am neither busy nor stress at work today..but yet sitting at my desk, i just have this uneasy feeling..feeling of anxiety, fear, lost etc.. the list goes on..
The only reason I can find for my depressing mood might be due to the lost of self-confidence.I've been observing myself for the past few days, realise that my level of self-confident is hitting into the danger zone..Have always been worrying that my help created more problem/trouble for colleague.. hiAZs..
I'm currently under an Interactive Producer. Been kind of his assistance for Web stuff.. He was a multi-tasker, acting as project manager, developer, consultant & mani more..So for nw, there are only 2 of us in the team doing development..& since he has so many roles to play. He is always busy..Most of the colleague having doubts with online stuffs will go to him..Can see that many times he is stress & tired. So i tried to ask if there is anything i can help. But maybe becos he is busy..i'm left alone to do my stuf most of the time, Not tat he will mind me disturbing him, but i just try not to..Maybe the more I hope to lighten his load, the more stress I feel..
Got to know from another colleague that he is trying to train me..That stress me even more..haha. I just somehow feel that he might be wasting his time.. argh!! just dun understand y I have so little confident with myself..I'm not that bad afterall right? he has given me a few lesson on flash scripting and I've been able to do some simple maintenance on my own so why shld i be feeling so useless? hiazs..
sometimes really wonder y certain pple can be so full of confident esp when in the eyes of others they are juz an empty nutshell..but they can just feel so proud of themselves.. y m i so low in self confident in all areas?? I'm even starting to doubt on my character.. The interesting/humorous character I thought I have, suddenly faded...............
Maybe my jokes has always been cold.. my topic has always been boring.. Mayb...............
hao wu liao de blog...........
hao wu liao..been surfing net for the past 2 hrs..din noe what to surf..read up fren's blog, surf facebook & friendster..realise both facebook & friendster dun interest me anymore..maybe cos it seems slow downloading pages frm the 2 sites..hmmmm..lost for a moment..pondering what I used to surf last time..haha..Nothing familar comes out of my mind...... hmmmmmmm.. haha..
a hectic day for me today.. was super duper busi at work..codes tat used to work..dun work today.. site launching soon..colleague face full of stress & tiredness..war in office..unknowingly i was involved!!.. *sweat!!*..haha..
rush to dentist appt after work..my tooth giving problem again. the problem have been there for quite some time..getting kind of worried & irritated..so decided to visit the dentist..as usu, dentist told me can't find out the cause..might be crack..this is the 3rd dentist i've consulted & dey all say suspected crack..but nothing can be done to cmf whether it is a crack anot..hiazs..if its a crack,another crowning needed..Wo Bu Yao!!!!!!!!! ..
the crowning for my font tooth have not done yet..think time to reali go source for a gd dentist to have it done..den i can proudly show off my teeth again... *Heeeeeeeeeee.. *
i want back my set of beautiful white teeth....... i'm seriously losing my confidence to smile with teeth.. will get back my confidence soon........... =)
Time to brush teeth.. gd nite everyone. =)
my fav number is out.. but.... but..... but..... Tuesday, July 1, 2008 / 10:22 PM
Look at the 4D result on 29 Jun 08..Wehhhhhhhhhhhhhh... my fav number was out!! IT WAS OUT!! & it's the exact number 2202!!.. but I nvr bet on it.. y? y? y? i've always been tinking hw come this beautiful number nvr strike.. on & off i do bet on it.. just on sunday i did not bet..& it was out!! there are 3 numbers i normally bet..out of the 3, the other 2 numbers ever let me win some $ b4..only 2202 nvr..
Actually its not the winnings that I feel heartpain on..my betting is small & the winnings will not b great..I'm more heartpain becos i did not get to strike on my fav number.. sobzs...
Shall try harder..zhen bu gan xin.. Grrrrrrrr...
Isolated world
Hang on.. Updating soon..
xxx
"Successful people did not get there by chance, they got there by design."
Look at the stars, and not the reflection of the moon.
WO De MA AH!!!
